A Tale Told by an Idiot
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mistersleepy's LiveJournal:
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| Saturday, September 2nd, 2006 | | 2:11 pm |
Fun Facts
Montgomery, Alabama is in Montgomery County. What is surprising about this is that the two entities were named after different people (Richard Montgomery and Lemuel P. Montgomery respectively). The mayor of Pittsburgh was born in the 1980's. Last week, Maria Esther de Capovilla died. She was born in the 1880's. She was born 5 months after Adolf Hitler. "If you can do no good, at least do no harm". -Hippocrates | | Friday, June 2nd, 2006 | | 11:32 am |
Crackpots
Ah, the random things you learn when you screw around online: C. S. Lewis has been perhaps the single most useful tool of Satan since his appearance in the Christian community sometime around World War II. Trivia Question: what do CS Lewis and Aldous Huxley have in common? | | Sunday, May 14th, 2006 | | 6:55 pm |
The things you learn
Apparently 'Jim Crow' was not an actual person. These are the things I can get away with not knowing because I'm from Canada. I had assumed he was a lawmaker or something. | | Sunday, April 30th, 2006 | | 10:03 am |
addendum
A few movies to add that I forgot last time: Harold & Kumar go to White Castle Die Hard The Professional Karakter You can count on me Falling Down Road to Perdition The Untouchables 12 angry men Tremors and I feel some sort of pressure to also list Eternal Sunshine of the spotless mind Lost in translation Apocalypse now The Godfather which I certainly enjoyed, but I'll have to see them again to make sure. "You don't know shit 'cause you've never been fucked in the ass!" -Kevin Bacon, "JFK" | | Monday, April 24th, 2006 | | 10:17 pm |
That new Dodge Durango commercial exemplifies everything that is wrong with this country. I feel very strongly about this. | | Thursday, April 13th, 2006 | | 6:43 pm |
That's wik, man
I am finding myself perusing the pages of Wikipedia more and more. I pretty much did not know what it was 6 months ago; now I'm referencing it at an alarming rate - and just when you've finishe a page there's some link in it that seems to warrant a further look. Even the talk pages are interesting from the point of view of referencing, journalistic standards, objectivity, etc. I hit rock bottom the other day when after a prolonged wiki-bender I found myself looking at a page on Hitler's step-nephew written in Greek - I had no idea how I had wound up there or how many hours I had been browsing. Oh, and needless to say, I don't read Greek. Today was so nice I biked up to Cup O' Joe, had a nice 90-minute conversation (that's really long for me - I'm usually a conversation-bailer: get out when the going gets boring. But my interlocutor in question and I have a good rapport.) I then even got some work done. Tuesday I start my generals. ("I didn't realize you had passed your Colonels" -Brian *) Apologies if I become lame and don't answer my phone. I need to start a list of my favorite movies. Being the pretentious twit that I am, there will be plenty of artsy/foreign-type films, but also a few good old-fashioned shoot-em-ups to maintain my street cred and/or heterosexual facade. It will include such films as The Big Lebowski American Psycho Robocop The Vanishing Requiem for a Dream The Decline of the American Empire Kolya Sideways 12 Monkeys Der Untergang The Assassination of Richard Nixon Fight Club Life is Beautiful Rising Sun Under Siege 2: Dark Territory Mulholland Drive The Sweet Hereafter *) He didn't actually say that but it's totally the kind of thing he would say Today's quote: "Are all these your faithful friends o' th' suburbs?" Shakespeare, Henry VIII (In an interesting reversal, the term 'suburbs' here suggests lawlessness, as they were outside the jurisdiction of the city.) -from my daily calendar 'Shakespeare's insults' | | 8:03 am |
What these things are for
I just woke up from a dream where some guy stabbed himself in the crotch with a massive syringe for no apparent reason. "'Twas once in the saddle I used to go ridin' Once in the saddle I used to go gay" -'The Streets of Laredo' | | Saturday, March 4th, 2006 | | 6:51 pm |
I am the son of a 65-year-old
If there's a bad Peter Stormare commercial out there, then I haven't seen it. It's not that I don't believe there are funnier things out there than seeing my soft-spoken Polish officemate read this http://www.joemonster.org/article.php?sid=5534 , it's just that I haven't come across any yet. Here's an exchange from Seinfeld, a show which maybe I should have paid more attention to. -He must be a communist. He reads the "Daily Worker". -Maybe he's just well-read? -And maybe he's just, well, red? | | Wednesday, February 15th, 2006 | | 8:11 pm |
Posting for posting's sake
I came across the Tonawanda Kardex today. Raise your hand if you know what that is. I didn't think so. Without looking it up, take a guess. Wrong. Words of wisdom: If you're ever going to seriously impersonate someone, you know go all out with a latex mask and makeup and stuff, make sure you find out if they have children, to avoid being caught up in a lie. It can't be that hard, can it? | | Monday, February 6th, 2006 | | 9:11 pm |
Bingo
I was walking around the tower the other day with a cup of coffee in my hand, and I couldn't help muttering stuff like "Peter... what's happening" and "yeah... Milton.... you're going to have to see payroll about that...". All I was missing was the suspenders. Gotta go perform some delicate surgery. | | Wednesday, February 1st, 2006 | | 10:00 pm |
And the winner is...
The previous post was not about Bill Clinton - it was about Alan Greenspan of all people. | | Tuesday, January 31st, 2006 | | 11:20 pm |
Pimpin'
Guess who this is a description of? (Hint: it's not me) More than one member of the Collective marveled at his ability to attract beautiful women. “It was incredible how he always had a beautiful woman at his side... I think it was the attraction of his intellectual power and probably his reserve. You couldn’t knock him over by batting your eyelashes at him. He certainly had a profound effect on women.” Another speculates: “Maybe he was a good kisser, from all those years as a saxophone player.” Today's quote: "Women are prodigal, spendthrift, and stupid." -JKM (also not me) | | Wednesday, January 25th, 2006 | | 7:50 pm |
Sesquisemiannual post
Two important things to pass along for my first post in forever: -The harpsichord is the most underrated musical instrument out there. -I know this makes me a horrible person, but when Gerald Ford actually dies, I'm gonna burst out laughing, because of this old SNL bit. "Wherever a Bavarian is not quite full, you'll be there. Wherever nacho penetration is less than total, you'll be there." -Pretzel magnate Frank Ormand Math quiz: according to the title of this post, every how many months do I post? | | Friday, October 7th, 2005 | | 5:17 pm |
I'm going slightly mad
Does the government have a strategic food reserve? You know, in case of some sort of massive agricultural crisis? If so, why don't I know about it? Where is it? How perishable is the food there? Has anybody read 'Miss Wyoming' by Douglas Coupland? I just got it out of the library on a whim. "Anybody who tells you money is the root of all evil doesn't fucking have any." -Ben Affleck in 'Boiler Room' | | Monday, September 5th, 2005 | | 2:26 am |
Mi casa
The house I grew up in: 45 29 02 42 N 73 36 05 53 W Google Earth is cooool. | | Saturday, September 3rd, 2005 | | 5:02 pm |
| | Friday, September 2nd, 2005 | | 7:01 pm |
I have the knee of a spry 83-year-old
Blatant opening-blog-post-with-a-song-lyric ripoff from Scott : "I don't want to be crippled cracked - shoulders, neck, knees and back" Radiohead, 'Bones' (from 'The Bends', the best album ever in my opinion) There are a lot of things we do every day that involve bending our knees that we don't even think about. Like getting into a car, taking a dump, watching TV, but strangely not so much walking (try it - you'll feel like a lame '50's robot, but you'll get around). My injury happened at a most inopportune time, right before a softball doubleheader; I feel I could have been the difference in the second game where we lost in extra innings to the best team in teh league). On the other hand, it's a most opportune time, because I have 3 weeks off so I can sit around and go to physical therapy whenever. I've had some restless, despairing, distressing, uncomfortable nights before, but last night wasn't one of them. It was very eerie, though. I decided it was time to lay off the NyQuil, which I had come to depend on to get to sleep over the past few days (I had had a cold). That kept me up. I also tried sleeping on my back, which I never do, because that was the most comfortable position for my leg; it made me bizarrely contemplative. Add to that the surreal and tragic happenings in NO and a Sopranos episode at 4am, it really made me disoriented yet strangely at peace. I got to sleep around 5:30 and woke up 2 hours later to call the post office which I barely remember. I woke up in a cold sweat - maybe I'm menopausal. | | Friday, August 26th, 2005 | | 3:35 am |
USA! USA!
The other day I was looking online (Google knows a.e.) for the definition of some term I'd heard on 'The Sopranos'. Turns out it was, um, a not nice term for black people. The first site I wound up at was a bulletin board (I'l spare you the URL) where the thread was basically 'what's a good synonym for n-----? (for all you Poe fans out there, no, that's not some weird 19th c. custom for omitting a proper name) What struck me was the routineness, the nonchalance, the 'normality' of it all; these were not psycho-Nazi-loner-redneck-Klansmen-etc. (as far as I could tell); they were 'regular' Americans, most of whom seemed decently educated, with handles such as 'AryanMom', spewing some of the vilest stuff I've come across in a while, very matter-of-factly, including anecdotes about what you can tell your kids that won't get them in trouble at school. WTF? I played softball today. I realized that over the past 4 games my OBP is around 1.000. I'm putting myself leadoff next game. I think we can actually win the whole thing, if the stars line up properly (and thanks to the potential absence of a certain Mr K_la_ _ _ski). Speaking of which, wow. that was quite a shock seeing that dude, with that mop on his head. I love being cryptic. Today's quote: "A thermometer is like a clock that tells the temperature." -Brian " 'cello " Holdren | | Thursday, August 25th, 2005 | | 9:47 pm |
| | Monday, August 15th, 2005 | | 11:49 pm |
I'm sober, which is a lot scarier
It occurred to me today that academia is to the corporate world what the corporate world is to organized crime. There's the allure of more money, more of a feeling of 'being out there in the real world', better success with the ladies; on the other hand there is increased stress, less (job) security (this works better in French because they have the same word for 'safety' and 'security'), more stress and competition, and of course the loss of one's soul. And no, I haven't watched every episode of the first 3 seasons of The Sopranos in the past 5 weeks. Has any American city fallen of the map more sharply than Decatur, Illinois? I am continually impressed by the raw functional simplicity of the UPS truck. I think that the scene with the hooker in 'Catcher in the Rye' is the best thing that ever happened to vice officers. Are 20$ bills worth their weight in gold? I went to the airport 5 times yesterday. If I ever see an analyst, I'll just say 'here's the URL to my blog, get back to me with a diagnosis'. I went grocery shopping today, then I went to Stauf's, then I went to my office, who the hell cares? Bah. Good night. "Most of American life consists of driving somewhere and then returning home, wondering why the hell you went." That's either a quote of mine, or one of John Updike's. |
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